I remembered I started to watch this series like… one year ago?
But for some reasons… I just stopped at Episode 1 and discontinued it.
Recently, I started to watch it again.
Seriously, I can’t bear the sadness in me when I am watching this Jdrama.
I supposed this is one of the most sad dramas I have ever watched.
Cuz’ I cried in almost every episode and I think my eyes are going blind soon.
That’s why I keep stopping from time to time and watch some other happier shows
before I get myself blinded with tears again.
But then again, by doing so, I am still able to be absorbed in the show again in no time
and cried so hard, just like I have been watching it without pause.
This is such a tearjerker and I feel so bastardized after watching this drama
because I think I just might be like anyone who’s in the show
revealing their annoyance in lending a helping hand to a patient every now and then.
It’s bad, I know. That’s why I feel so bastardized.
What I want to say here is just…
I am glad that I woke up in the morning and I have control over my body.
I am glad that I am still alive.
I am glad that I can do what I want to do.
I am glad that… I am able to help others rather than asking for help.
However, I think this line:
“Being sick is not a sin, it’s just an inconvenience” is still as meaningful.
I don’t like to sympathize others, because that just mean that they are weaker than me.
I mean… It’s like,I think everyone’s really equal.
It’s just that the way you perceive others.
I think it’s not sympathy they needed, but empathy.
Understand them, rather than thinking them as “pitiful”.
It’s insulting to be sympathized (for me).
But I still sympathize…(contradicting, I know.)
I cried hard, but I know I am still alive and healthy.
I cried hard, because I hate the disease which tortures the poor patients so much.
I cried hard, because I saw how life can be so realistic.
I cried hard, because I saw the strength in Ikeuchi Aya.
Maybe I don’t understand their pain… But what I can do now, is to live to my utmost.
Moreover, isn’t life just like that?
You won’t know what’s up for you tomorrow.
是否流了一公升的眼泪才学得会怎样去面对明天？
那我宁愿不流这一公升的眼泪，但我会学会怎样去开心、知足。
纵然会有挫折、失败、灰心的时候，我希望我可以是坚强的。
sarah said,
March 9, 2008 @ 10:41 pm
ah hah i love this series! It got me hooked on jdramas!! but i tell u, i got the entire series sitting in my lappie EXCEPT ep 1. LOL. cuz after ep1’s continuous buffering disrupting me den i learned to dl de show. n when i turn back, ep 1 is gone. LOL.
rting said,
March 9, 2008 @ 11:17 pm
rofl. how come ep. 1 gone like that?
omg, i cried like an idiot cuz of this show lah.
i don’t like sad stuff!!! >_<
but I have to admit it’s one of the best jdrama. XD
Meeu said,
June 9, 2008 @ 2:30 pm
i remembered watching this film with the lights out and i didn’t even notice the tears falling down until i ended one episode.
“But I still sympathize…(contradicting, I know.)” —> it’s true. because as much as we have their feelings to think about, we also have ours as well. we feel that because we dread the loss of life, of the memories, and of the future.
but i don’t think it’s insulting. sympathy (for me anyways), is just a manifestation of your value. . . that they want you to have lived longer and want to be with you in times ahead. it is as they say “that it is as hard for the friends/relatives the victims as the victims themselves, but perhaps, much more”, despite the fact that medically speaking, it is not advisable to show sympathy to an ailing patient who wants to accept the gravity/reality of his/her situation and what to do with his/her life from then on.
rting said,
June 9, 2008 @ 8:22 pm
I know what u mean… But sometimes, I just feel like shutting myself from all these stuffs because I don’t want to sink into that kind of feelings. It’s unbearable, especially if one of my closed ones is ill. Sigh.
zayra said,
June 11, 2009 @ 9:51 am
it’s the best Jdrama..i mean it’s true because each episode can make you cry and sometimes you don’t even notice that your crying with them, erika sawajiri is a great actress, she can make paople realize that she’s the one with the disease, and the songs are great it fits the story, i wish i had aya’s diary…(dreaming?!?)..